Sunday, October 10, 2004
just the other week my guy broke up with me.. at the same day i was kicked out of my house. what a day right?
my bestfriend has another bestfriend whom she loves spending time with... im jealous... hahaha sounds wrong... i know.
my grandmother, didnt talk to me for a week!
rosselle, one of my realy close friends told me the other day that i changed. not anymore the wacky and happy go lucky girl that i used to be.
pressured with school.
quit the volleyball team.
i dont know whats happening to me... it seems like this is my breaking point. i lost my boyfriend whom i honestly didnt think of falling inlove with but i did. lucky me... his problem? hes not affectionate, he loves me but he doesnt know how to act like it. my problem? him... because meer fact that i love him. i want him, but hes not what i deserve. but i insist on pursuing him.
losing a friend its more than enough to break down for me... i love them more than my life.
now that i lost a lot of things. including my appetite for socializing.
im lost, i dont feel comfortable with people around..im not emotionally stable though i try to be.
in the classroom i sense somehow everyones superficial, fake. this is not true.
the only person i feel comfortable with is Kat. this is really bad.
i feel paranoid, overly concious. im stupified by whats happening.
i had a lot of friends, in just a snap i dont know whos real?.... sad isnt it..
my grandma and i are cool now.
josh and i are friends. trying to be at least. hes my bumpkin.
jill, i hope shes happy with micah. and stays that way.
i just saw two rainbows at the same time
fascinating, so beautiful.
hope is still out there for me to find.
all the things are crashing into me at the same time.
its so hard to be sad. its just not me.
hopefully i get over this phase soon.
so life is not put to waste.
in memories of: haha parang patay na...
karen blew you kisses @ 2:15 AM
retreat!
